I am frustrated victim of chain mails

Hi dear, good you visited me here. Wait... don't go away. I would like you to be part of this frustrating situation as well :D.

Basically, I wanted to thank all my friends and family who have forwarded chain letters to me in 2003 & 2004 & 2005 & 2006 & 2007

Because of their kindness:

* I stopped drinking Coca Cola after I found out that it's good for removing toilet stains.

* I stopped going to the movies for fear of sitting on a needle infected with AIDS.

* I smell like a wet dog since I stopped using DEODRANTS because they cause CANCER.

* I don't leave my car in the parking lot or any other place and sometimes. I even HAVE TO WALK about 7 blocks for fear that someone will DRUG ME with a perfume sample and try to rob me.

* I also stopped ANSWERING THE PHONE for fear that they may ask me to dial a stupid number and then I get a PHONE BILL from with calls to Uganda , Singapore and Tokyo .

* I also stopped drinking anything OUTOF A CAN for fear that I will get sick from the RAT FECES and URINE.

* When I go to parties, I don't look at any girl, no matter how hot she is, for fear that she will take me to a hotel, DRUG ME then take my KIDNEYS and leave me taking a nap in a bathtub full of ice.

* I also donated all my savings to the Amy Bruce account. A sick girl that was about to die in the hospital about 7,000 times. (Poor girl! she's been 7 since 1993...)

! * I went BANKRUPT from bounced checks that I made expecting the $15,000 that Microsoft and AOL were supposed to send me when I participated in their special e-mail program would arrive soon.

* My FREE NOKIA PHONE never arrived and neither did the free passes for a paid vacation to DISNEYLAND.

* Still open to help some from Bulgaria who wants to use my account to transfer his UNCLE'S PROPERTY of SOME HUNDRED MILLIONS $$$$.

IMPORTANT NOTE: If you do not send this e-mail to at least 11,246 people in the next 10 mins, a bird will SH** on your head today at 6:30pm.